lying in america

I really should try to keep count of all the reasons I hate corporate america.

I feel like a native laying on the beach 6 months after columbus landed the first time. we're sitting there talking about all the things we hate about columbus and fucking spain...the disease, the deceit, the disrespect, literally, the holier than thou attitude these shit kicking jerks have.

theyre soldiers and salesmen. everything is either protocol or snow job blow job. there were so few people I could trust in those days and even those I Did couldnt be trusted cause it was nothing but one big political killing field.

I'm not sure I can blame them cause it takes a fully developed human to maneuver in those waters without getting rats in your gut and barnacles on your underbelly. and I've never seen anything approximating maturity in that environment. in other words, it's a place that shouldnt exist in the first place.

the fucking spaniards should never have set up camp on our island. they shoulda stayed in spain where the fucking rain stays mainly in the fucking plain. they set up a system you simply canNot tell the truth in and survive. you canNot say anything to anyone you wouldnt say personally to every dip shit right on up the line cause there's no natural law that Keeps shit from going both ways.

in fact, bosses love pulling out their little shit vacuums, probing and violating, sucking up bits of information for the files. even if its nothing more than rumor and dingle berries plucked specifically to get the drop on whoever you already think you might wanna get rid of cause they dont grovel to your satisfaction.

it's all rats on a rotting corpse of a ghost ship from on your mark. no one expects the spanish inquisition, but fuck, they sure as hell get around, huh?


I Knew for a fucking fact a certain program director was filling my file with lies. it's why I hated her so much. or rather why I hated a system that rewarded lies and the people who loved telling them and punished all who dared reverence truth. the more truth you tell in corporate america, the closer you get to the front door or, rather, the back door and an alley soiled with random bits of kicked ass and the administrative puke of the unexorcised.

it's a fucking ass nightmare of a fucking ass fucking ass game and they truly believe it's this american life. abby told me, straight up, "in your job, you cant be yourself. you have to be what someone else says you are."

I laughed...Then.